七月二十五日，阴

actually today i intended to go to the bank to get my bank account verified so the school can transfer my pay into my account. my precious $100 !! haha. As I was about to leave my house, I realised that I lost my giro form. So my day ended up looking all over my room to find that giro form. I realised that although my room appears to be very neat, my things are really nt organized. And things tt shud be thrown a long time ago are still in my drawers. So i intend to tidy up my stuff...

as i was packing. i went thru alot of things. gifts and letters from frens etc. alot of things cross my mind. i realised everytime when i see those tingy, it nv fail to make me feel guilty or bad for nt doing enuff things to make ppl ard me happy. but then everytime, i chose to left those feelings, along with my gifts and letter, accumulate at a corner of my room.. at a corner of my heart. I have realised how much care and love i had received.. but then i also realised how much i didnt do for others. i felt bad. really bad..reading ppl's blog. reading other's lives, always make me feel like everyone's loving for one and another. but me? im like worrying for my own things.. i dunnoe why i always feel so occupied by my own matter... =/

Perhaps it just another period when I am more easily affected emotionally ba, but I wanna get control of my life. Don't wanna just let these thoughts faded with time.. then when i suddenly recalled them, i will feel more terrible than the previous time. Maybe before i realised, i already have left ppl's heart le..

haha, pretty 扫兴 hor. Like it has been so long since i just updated and the 1st update happened to be so serious? =p haha. just feel like letting it out than to keep it to myself ba.

Perhaps instead of just letting negative thoughts come and destroy me, i should start taking actions!! analyse why i am the way i am and do things abt it..

2 fundamental needs of a human: to give love and to receive love. i shud do more in giving love to others! haha.. so i shall go ard finding ppl's love language and start flooding them with my love =p

i wanna be able to control my emotion! control my life! yay!! 加油,盈秀!!

thanks to those who realised im abit more emo and talk to me huh. u noe who u are. (: